I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
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