Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize