are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
