The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I didn't notice because vodka
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
