Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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