They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
