GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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