It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
