she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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