I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
