this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
