you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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