Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
