he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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