so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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