More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
