So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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