Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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