He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
