I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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