About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
We are two peas in an std pod
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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