I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
But theres a keg here and me gusta
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
