yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
