Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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