I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
