my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Randomize
