I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
