Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
