No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
