The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
