O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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