oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Green mimosas i think yes
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize
