a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
