Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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