Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize