do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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