dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Semen is not good for contacts.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
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