I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
