My boss' voice literally gives me gas
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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