Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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