It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
