I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
