Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
