Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
