haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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