What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Randomize
