you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
