GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
