u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
