when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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