hell yes lets make some ravioli
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
